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The Staircase

  • Aug. 24th, 2009 at 1:51 AM
Happy Shy
I wrote my first poem when I was 10 and a half years of age.  The 6th of December, 1999 19911.  The memories of that day came flooding back to me in a rush of amused astonishment and realization that I once was a kid, and I recognize that innocence, that lack of worldly insight and awareness that I had back then.  I'm still a noon noob2 today, but I'm quite certain that I've moved on along the path to a slow, inevitably miserable death.

The day I wrote this poem, stands crystal clear in my mind.  I remember the weather, the odors and scents of the world around me, the colours of the flowers, the sun glistening off the fresh blood that was just beginning to coagulate upon my knee..  It's something I will never forget.

Here's the poem as it was originally written.  Don't laugh now..  :)



" The Staircase "


In the early mist and fog, asleep,
        down the stairs that always creak,
shivering with bucket, mug and soap,
        Oh, the staircase, such a dope!

It's creaking away, at the nick of hope,
        as I brushed my hair, the staircase still a dope..

In the early mist and fog, asleep,
        I tried to warm my hands,
The staircase will always creak,
        I thought the staircase had got fangs,

I knew I could'nt stare and see,
        because I thought it looked at me.

I knew the staircase had no hands,
        when I saw how it hangs,
A lizard fell on me,
        so I shouted "Eek!",
                the staircase replied "Creak!".

Angirasa - 199112063




I'm going out on a limb here and am incredibly vulnerable to negative feedback (even positive can hurt fyi!, so be careful).  I was a kid when I sat down to write it, and I never went back to review it later.  This is the rawest deal that you'll ever get out of me (I think).  So wear your kiddy gloves please, I'm especially sensitive about this poem, 'cause when I wrote it back then, I was, and now again when I post it up for you guys to read, I still am a kid.  :)

This poem is among the first of a long string of literary embarrassments.  It's full of bungles and paints a stupid childish world.  So yeah, I do _know_ that the poem's not worth writing home about, and don't need to be told that either.  :)

Kaydeeyoh!

//update:
1corrected weird year in date thanks to pinak
2spelling corrected by subtle_blues
3removed extra '0', thanks to subtle_blues

Comments

rythm wrote:
Aug. 23rd, 2009 08:47 pm (UTC)
Its nice and funny :)
angiasaa wrote:
Aug. 23rd, 2009 08:59 pm (UTC)
Thanks. :)

On a slighty more sober note: Are you online 24/7? :-o
rythm wrote:
Aug. 24th, 2009 10:49 am (UTC)
Hehehe, not exactly :) Weekends provide more time to check LJ frequently.
angiasaa wrote:
Aug. 25th, 2009 07:23 pm (UTC)
Dang! I shoulda guessed! O_o :P
subtle_blues wrote:
Aug. 23rd, 2009 10:11 pm (UTC)
*Eek* :-D

Funny poem. So did you fall off the stairs when u wrote it? Why the blood on the knee?
angiasaa wrote:
Aug. 25th, 2009 07:25 pm (UTC)
Thanks, though at the time, it was a dead serious poem. :P The blood came from surgery done on my knee with a divider. :)
subtle_blues wrote:
Aug. 25th, 2009 08:49 pm (UTC)
surgery done on my knee with a divider
details?
angiasaa wrote:
Aug. 27th, 2009 07:39 pm (UTC)
Different forum needed for them details.. :)
(no subject) - crabbycool - Aug. 24th, 2009 04:58 am (UTC)
angiasaa wrote:
Aug. 25th, 2009 07:30 pm (UTC)
I'm muchly pleased that you liked it! :) It's funny how some of the stuff we write as kids and then re-read as adults, looks so unfortunately childish and blind nahi? Age is but an excuse. It was me back then, and it still is. :P I just look older now. :-D

Only someone who's grown up in a public schooling system can relate to this. Unfortunately, most Indians lack that experience. :) *hugs!*
inspirethoughts wrote:
Aug. 24th, 2009 05:24 pm (UTC)
Cute I must say, considering you wrote when you were a kid. :)
angiasaa wrote:
Aug. 25th, 2009 07:31 pm (UTC)
Me still a kid you know. Look at me, I'm not married yet!! I can't imagine why the girls keep forgetting that fact. :P

Hmmm.... cute.... :o)
inspirethoughts wrote:
Aug. 26th, 2009 03:12 pm (UTC)
Oh no one is forgetting the fact since it is etched on your forehead..."Unmarried and available"...LOL! *runs to hide under the chair*
angiasaa wrote:
Aug. 26th, 2009 08:03 pm (UTC)
lol! Yeah, very single. Almost lonesomely so. But I'm not really available just yet. I'm doomed to end the mostly quiet legacy of my family at this generation one way or another. :-D

Woooo hooo! Come out, come out, wherever you are! You can't hide forever you know. :P
inspirethoughts wrote:
Aug. 26th, 2009 09:37 pm (UTC)
I'm not really available just yet.
You contradict your own statements. How can you be single and not available at the same time?

LOL! I feel for your parents then! ;)

I cant hide forever, but I can run...*run, run, run*
angiasaa wrote:
Aug. 27th, 2009 09:11 pm (UTC)
I'm single, but my heart's aflutter. No chance anyone's getting me anytime soon for certain. :(

A better way to put it would be "I'm single, but not looking." :)

I can "chase, chase, chase"! :P
(no subject) - inspirethoughts - Aug. 27th, 2009 09:43 pm (UTC)
(no subject) - rechristened - Aug. 25th, 2009 09:33 am (UTC)
angiasaa wrote:
Aug. 25th, 2009 07:33 pm (UTC)
Danke, danke! :) I'll be putting up bits and pieces up here from when I was a wide eyed creature of wonder on spindly legs. This poem was just the beginning. :P
subtle_blues wrote:
Aug. 25th, 2009 07:54 pm (UTC)
creature of wonder on spindly legs

:-)You haven't changed much, have you? ;)
angiasaa wrote:
Aug. 26th, 2009 07:54 pm (UTC)
Grrr! 'course not! :oP
pinak wrote:
Aug. 26th, 2009 02:33 am (UTC)
"Yes, I'm at least 14 years old" * click *

"I wrote my first poem when I was 10 and a half years of age. The 6th of December, 1999..."

WTF! Are you telling me that in 1999 u were 10 yr old. umm... correct me if I am wrong, does that mean you are 20 now. And 4-5 years ago when we binged on alcohol at easy rider, ofd...etc you were 15.
angiasaa wrote:
Aug. 26th, 2009 07:57 pm (UTC)
Goodness me! That was silly of me. :) I changed it now.. 1991 it was.

:o) Hehe! When are you gonna be back in town? I miss you already man!
(Anonymous) wrote:
Nov. 8th, 2009 02:48 pm (UTC)
My my... so many disclaimers to a fairly well written piece of work for a first timer. =)

Hello and long time.

- Ex-featuring_nish =)
www.bitterblackjuice.wordpress.com
angiasaa wrote:
Nov. 9th, 2009 12:18 pm (UTC)
I'm perhaps obviously over-critical of myself and my own work. The funny thing is that most of the stuff I've written seems immature and foolishly constructed when I get around to reading it sometime in the future.

I can't help it. I just sound unbelievably silly when I re-read stuff I've written a while ago. Do we all do that?

It's lovely seeing you here again. (though I have the creepy feeling that this is just a "once in a decade" visit. I'll probably have to cuddle up to your wordpress up-do. :)

I'll add your link to my list of links. I thought we'd lost you for good. Glad to see you're still clawing on the inside of the coffin. :)
(Anonymous) wrote:
Feb. 5th, 2010 12:36 am (UTC)
hi
I am looking to hire a blogger to help me with my internet marketing. I am attempting to create a large internet based marketing structure for my branch in Bank of America. Through, blogs, listings, tweets, and posts. Please email me if you are interested and we can start negotiating.
I will give complete step by step instructions on how and what to write, it will mainly be cutting and pasting and following direction.
If not interested please refer me to someone who might be.
michael.vrlaku@bankofamerica.com
angiasaa wrote:
Mar. 28th, 2010 04:56 pm (UTC)
Re: hi
I'm sorry dear anonymous reader, but that is not how blogging works. Strangely, that's an underhanded marketing ploy. :) Clearly, you need a bit more experience in this area before you encounter something more sustainable. But in the mean while, have a great time! :o) Kaydeeyoh!
wildstrikers wrote:
Mar. 28th, 2010 04:50 pm (UTC)
short and sweet
nice and funny

cheers
angiasaa wrote:
Mar. 28th, 2010 04:54 pm (UTC)
lol! And it's been ages since I last posted an update. The next update will probably be an eyefull, but it will be soon! Thanks for dropping by and hope to see you around more often! :o)
wildstrikers wrote:
Mar. 28th, 2010 04:56 pm (UTC)
looking forward to your next entry

take care
angiasaa wrote:
Mar. 28th, 2010 04:58 pm (UTC)
Just read a couple of your posts. Interesting style! I never ask people before adding them, and don't usually tell them when I do, but well.. I'm adding you. :)