Angirasa Acharya (aka Jim....) (angiasaa) wrote,
Angirasa Acharya (aka Jim....)

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Growing up feels like..

I feel old. :) and I probably am. I've lost most of the energy I once used to put into everything I did. Too many things mean too little to me. I hardly spend time on anything I don't consider my own. Once upon a time, I was sure I was going to inherit the earth. But the older I get, the more I realize that I have and own absolutely nothing!

It's not about growing old though.. It's about realizing that I've been a complete idiot and that I've valued things that never even existed in the first place.

It's scary when the world you wished for, the world you so truly believed in, suddenly cracks.. It fractures in a million places and crumbles in slow motion, down into a cloud of dust around you. You wish you'd realized sooner and shielded yourself from it all, but then, you're only human right?

This is not a depressed post though. It's just as a matter of fact, my view through tinted glasses. It just amuses me though, how willingly one would kill themselves to pursue a dream they're so terribly certain will never ever come true. Even if there's absolutely no possibility of realization of such a dream, like lambs, we follow the wisp of a dream into the Sausage Machine.

How many of you have encountered a similar experience, where it suddenly dawns upon you that everything you loved, held close, and worked hard to take care of, was just you deluding yourself?

I'm not sure, but I think there's enough salt in the sausages today..

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Tags: life, mince, mind, old, rant, real

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