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Jul. 14th, 2003

  • 2:30 AM
Over Stand
I see faces I have never seen before and before I can move my mind around, I begin seeing good things. I have turned a partially blind eye toward the evil that I used to see. It' so much better when the world looks good and decent around me. A smile does the trick most of the time and sometimes, I catch myself smiling at my past self. So unmotivated, so fragile, so careless and so small. People mean more and people mean less in pretty neat stacks to equilibrium. And frankly, I feel better about myself. :) I can't possibly be better than I already am if I worry about all the small bits and pieces of denial in my mind. Doubt still remains, but it's more or less under control. One thing is for certain though, I'll always remember the bad periods of my life as long as I live....

Life really has it's ways of putting twists into things when you least expect it to. :o)

Being me is so much easier once I am free of all my mental conflictions.... There's something to always drag you down, but it takes casting those downers away to fix things for a better situation in the end. :o)

I'm glad I finally saw it. :o) You know.... Sometimes, it's not logical to let the mind do the work of the heart. :) When that happens, then love is treated like a game.... Don't feel shy, Feeling shy about it is actually the most natural thing to do. And well.... You have something to smile about too. Hehe. So.... *Sigh!*

Oh and by the way, when you look up at the sky and you see the clouds move way overhead, know you always, that they shall move on and the sun shall shine on you once again.... :o)

I have friends who've always been lovely friends to me, someone I could always regard and turn to no matter what the times.... They may not be close at hand physically but they have always been close enough to be a source of comfort to my mind in good and bad times.... And there's no way I can tell them everything that makes them so very important and special to me....

Let me ponder over something aloud, My friends have always meant more to me than anything else I can think of, in my life. It's a strange world that we live in and for some strange reason, I find a kind of a serene satisfaction in knowing that people are out there somewhere, always on my side, weather I'm being bad or good, you guys are always there to stand by me and jab a finger in my ribs when I go wrong. That is something that I sincerely look up to. You are one of the few people who have made a deep impression in my heart and you shall always, always be a part of me....

I am now a very different person from the image that I conjure up in my mind regarding what I would have been had I never met friends like you. All I can say is that my thanx are not enough. You've made me see things in myself that I could only have imagined existed. They shall forever have a very very valuable place in my heart!

I know that's a good bit of non-modesty, but then again, sometimes it does'nt pay at all to be modest. lol! :o)

Did I mention - I'm smiling right now!
My friends are more than words can ever express or fathom.

More importantly, if it's not you I'm speaking about here in my Journal, don't feel you're missing out on something cause I think you're not.... If you are spoken about in here, just know, you're closer to my heart than you can ever imagine.....

Comments

datempest wrote:
Jul. 13th, 2003 02:10 pm (UTC)
i said it before and im gonna say it again... i can feel and see the change coming about in u... do correct me if i am wrong in thinkin... but there is a person who was inside of u, fightin day and night to come out of all the clutter... and finally he has found a way out and not only dat... he has found a way to remove the clutter too...

spring cleaning is a good thing to do...keeps the mind clear and well focused...

Feeling lighter and better i hope

stay up in da clouds baby.. today is ur day!!!

Nix

ps i shall post a proper reply to ur post. for now this will do...
angiasaa wrote:
Jul. 13th, 2003 05:01 pm (UTC)
My day it is! :o)

yes, I'm feeling much better! :o) Is the change for the better? I'm realloy unsure, but that does'nt matter, maybe I'll see more than I already do in my life. :o)

Yes, you're not wrong, The clutter seems to be gone.... Hopefully, and I'm hopeful, for good! :-D

take ytour time in the reply, It'll be some time I think before I update again. :-D

Kaydeeyoh!