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Smiling at the world I left behind....

  • Mar. 17th, 2004 at 2:14 AM
Day Dreams of Love
No, don't ask.... :) The answers regarding who, ain't comming anytime soon. :) lol!
If you've got the slightest bit of curosity left, just check what lies behind the cut below. :P



Waltzing in glorified regret through
the passage from sleep to wakefulness,
I awaken from a dream so subtly new
and beautiful in it's repercussions....

The surface of the dream, pimpled,
with clear domes and obtuse angles.
Glazed dusty disuse and alienation,
I draw myself from under the warm sheets,

leading myself into a world of differences,
almost jarringly so I'd say in comparison,
but lying not unto myself, I cheer to see the morning,
brought upon my lids with such beautiful past.

With intonation denoting interpretation,
winning individuals defouling institutions,
wanting illict demoralized insence,
willfully I discover interference....

tu vedi dictum est?
say I to you and the rest,
No value to void my thoughts,
I see plain as in beauty,

the thoughts that you so often fill my mind with,
jealousy threatens to over boil....
No chance say Cupid to I
I need consolance to extract

Deviant from moralistic thought,
Oh say you, I, what rests within?
writhing in silence, stirring harmony,
You touch my heart and feel me wrap about you....

Secretly I enter into your mind,
craving entrance into your fantasies,
Close your eyes and let me set you free,
the darkness in your eyes belongs to me....

Floating through intoxicated wisps of tender perfume,
I glide toward the power of your mind....
silent, darkened, sensual, you touch my soul,
deceiving the world is part of my life....

But you, dear angel, you lift me into your life....


watch me darken when you are with me,
The colors catalyze into me,
I fall into a frantic persual,
charged by forces afore unknown to me....

Vanishing gradually, disintegrating from solidity,
entering into your heart, I enumerate slowly,
watching, feeling, entering slowly....
to lie in comfort, your heart is all I need.

Your arms tenderly holding me close,
My heart seeking yours, such innocent love,
I leave the world far behind, who cares for it anyway?
A smile forms upon my kissed lips, it's you, I love....

sifting through seeds of love long last,
winnowing love at various levels carefully,
you stand out plain and pure, love long lost,
love long unfound.... :)

flirting graciously, tending delicate strings of puppetry,
caressing your cheek in wishful strokes....
I gently seal the light from my eyes,
smiling at the world I left behind....

All for the heart that took me away,
It fed my longing, my hunger, my thirst....
And most of all, it gave me more than ever,
I could take from the world....


Comments are welcome!
Kaydeeyoh!

(edit: I have'nt read this since I typed it. So don't blame me for spelling mistakes or bad structuring. I posted this here after having typed it out in a freak moment. the rest is ofcourse, a blur....)

(edit2: After having received a huge number of questions regarding my latin Metaphors, here's the metaphoric translation and the literal one too....
"tu vedi dictum est?"
literal:
"You I-came Whatever-is-Said/Spoken Is?"
Metaphoric:
"It is right, It is Fitting, It is Lawful?" and "As much as in me lies?" (: take care.)

Tags:

Comments

psychog wrote:
Mar. 17th, 2004 12:14 am (UTC)
oh no!
whoops! no patience to read all that dude. besides it aint my kinda stuff. no offence intended! but my best wishes to ya...
(no subject) - yawhatever - Mar. 17th, 2004 12:52 am (UTC)
psychog wrote:
Mar. 17th, 2004 01:05 am (UTC)
Re: oh no!
oh well..ok! point noted! i jus commented ta wish him jus incase and then blurted the fact that i didnt read. honest chap! *pats himself* honest spam!
:P
angiasaa wrote:
Mar. 17th, 2004 02:28 am (UTC)
Re: oh no!
Thanks for the wishes dude.... Though I'd prefer that the wishes come via messenger or something. even e-mail would do.

I'm available on angiasaa.at.livejournal.com.

I'm marking this comment as [OT] btw....

P.S.: All [OT] comments are normally deleted once I've read them and mark them as [OT]....

Kaydeeyoh!

Good wishes to you too.

P.S.: if you don't read a post of mine, Don't tell me, it hurts..
angiasaa wrote:
Mar. 17th, 2004 02:20 am (UTC)
Re: oh no!
No Girija, you don't sound too patronising at all, infact, your point is valid in every respect....

That was indeed comment spam.... I usually just delete such message but have been laxing of late. The reason being that, ever since LJ went free to the public, the new users have begun to disregard long standing morality issues like commenting where it's obviously disorienting.

It will take a while before people begin to realize what it's like to have people drop in to say they have'nt read your post.

It's painful to see that people come to your page, and just dropped a note saying "I don't care, don't be offended, Never read the post" and push off....

I'd rather people dropped in, read the post, and leave without posting than have peopl who drop in, don't read and yet leave a comment saying that they did'nt read it.

One of the reasons why people don't comment on my journal is because they fear other people will read what they have to say. Most comments come by mail (don't ask why!). Many people just drop in to read my Posts and they leave without comments, It's okay with me....

roopa1978 gave me a new insight that fits very well into the scheme ofthings, I'll talk of that later sometime.... But she's promised to post here every now and then and I look forward to that. :">

NEways, comming back to the point, I welcome comments, even if they are just to tell me that my post was not read or that it was unreadable or that it was lousy.... And well, the good thing is that some comments can be deleted/screened and some can be left without subsequent answers. :) People have an uncanny way of learning from sarcasm.... :)

Kaydeeyoh!
brainz wrote:
Mar. 17th, 2004 04:49 am (UTC)
Re: oh no!
Similar issue.
Re: oh no! - angiasaa - Mar. 17th, 2004 10:32 am (UTC)
brainz wrote:
Mar. 17th, 2004 04:46 am (UTC)
Re: oh no!
*thwap* *thwack*

Don't post for no reason everywhere just to announce that you exist on LJ.

gaurav@lemuracharya.com

*runs away, checks and crawls back*

angiasaa wrote:
Mar. 17th, 2004 10:36 am (UTC)
Re: oh no!
Enough! psychog has learnt from his mistakes. :) No need to hammer him anymore, He's not a bad guy, he just made a small mistake and he's fine again....

Kaydeeyoh!

P.S.: Not reprimanding you @brainz, Just making sure we don't end up with a flame here. :) That poem is from the heart (as are all the other poems I write.) It was be painful to have it flame up here. besides, Our friend, I'm sure, knows not to tred on soft soil too carelessly. :)
datempest wrote:
Mar. 17th, 2004 02:55 am (UTC)
As always, this poem too held me in awe, the effortlessness that seems to shine through, its like you just pick up a pen, and there the poem writes itself out. Beautiful.

My morbid habit of dissecting many of your posts 'n' poems is finding its urge to take over, so I will post a my detailed thoughts in a few hours.
angiasaa wrote:
Mar. 17th, 2004 02:59 am (UTC)
Yes, the poems usually write themselves out. :)

There's a slight difference between my poetry and my prose.... The prose usually deals with stuff directly, and report them as and how they're happening.

The poetry on the other hand tends to deal with the expression of the emotions that flood through my soul.... It's not really the content that should matter when people read them, it should be the emotions that they dig up and throw to the surface. :)

I'll await your analisys Angel!

*kisses!*
datempest wrote:
Mar. 17th, 2004 02:45 pm (UTC)
Yep Im back again!*insert evil laughter here*
I can see the difference between your poetry and prose. What comes out to you as poetry, comes out as prose to me. Which is why I can never write poetry.

Like I said earlier, the poem is really a lovely work of art. You have captured emotions of love and happiness so beautifully. When I was reading the poem, a mental image formed in my mind. The image of a young man, who is surrounded by the beautiful and powerful feeling of love, and needless to say, he has been swept of his feet!

An angelic, divine presence has entered his life, and although he is held in absolute wonder, he cherishes and protects the bond he shares, sometimes with fierce jealousy.

It is really a lovely tribute to the one your heart holds dear, although I denote a tiny little sense of fear. The fear of losing. The emotion of love is overwhelming, and seems to flow through your veins. Enjoy the power and peace that it brings, and never misuse it!

Oh, and kisses for you too!
angiasaa wrote:
Mar. 18th, 2004 02:20 am (UTC)
The Devils own! :)
I can see the difference between your poetry and prose. What comes out to you as poetry, comes out as prose to me. Which is why I can never write poetry.

Ofcourse you can write poetry. :P Every one can write, whatever works for them might be different for you, but at the end of the day, we're all banalcing each other out are'nt we? ;) I sometimes write prose-like poetry.... It's basically prose, but it flows with rhythm and sometimes goes as far as to actually rhyme.... :)

You have captured emotions of love and happiness so beautifully.

Thankyou. But it's still too far from perfect. I just re-read the poem.... It's not the kind of stuff that I normally find myself writing, it's different in many a sense.... It's strange in a sense, but it's still something that i believe in.... It's not just hope, but a vision of the future.... :)

When I was reading the poem, a mental image formed in my mind. The image of a young man, who is surrounded by the beautiful and powerful feeling of love, and needless to say, he has been swept of his feet!

An angelic, divine presence has entered his life, and although he is held in absolute wonder, he cherishes and protects the bond he shares, sometimes with fierce jealousy.


A lovely way to say ina few lines, what I'd said in four hundred and fourteen words! For someone to actually visualise and understand what it was that was in my mind when I wrote that poem is a commendable thing in my opinion. And frankly, for you to actually see what I'm saying draws you closer in a sense. :) Your visualisation is very accurate. :) *hugs*

It is really a lovely tribute to the one your heart holds dear, although I denote a tiny little sense of fear. The fear of losing.

I've had a few mails pointing out the same thing.... The fear of loss seems to charge most of my emotional senses.... I often tend to value my possessions so much that even the mere thought of the loss of a fraction of something that I have is so unbelievably painful, that I get overloaded and pressed into the sands around me.... It's something I would never want to happen to me.... Losing something that you vaue with all your heart can be so painful, one can't even begin to imagine unless they've been through it before.... :(

The emotion of love is overwhelming, and seems to flow through your veins. Enjoy the power and peace that it brings, and never misuse it!

You have my word on that. :) Not that it was required, but I've learnt with experience that with power comes the necessity to learn responsibility. Morality might be a hard burden to carry and walk around the place with, but it is certainly not worth it if misuse occurs....

Thankyou for your insights, I value them....
(no subject) - yawhatever - Mar. 17th, 2004 08:28 am (UTC)
angiasaa wrote:
Mar. 17th, 2004 10:44 am (UTC)
*blushes!* Thankyou Girija,

I'm not a 'Gloria Estefan follower', and have never heard that song before.... The only song i've heard that I actually like by the lady is "Reach". The others, i don't remember even.... :P

I must agree though, she has a wonderful voice.... :) It's the first thing I noticed about her that made me listen to "reach" over and over.... I still love the song. :)

Kaydeeyoh!
atharvan wrote:
Mar. 17th, 2004 10:33 am (UTC)
I read that yesterday but couldn't post my comment immediately..It happens sometimes, especially with your posts (I do read all of them, but I do not respond immediately because that wouldn't convey my exact thoughts on how what you've written has struck me).
It takes time for my mind to react to whatever feelings and sentiments that arise on reading this. Very good poem, Jim, and all the more better since you've written it down spontaneously.

Your arms tenderly holding me close,
My heart seeking yours, such innocent love,
I leave the world far behind, who cares for it anyway?
A smile forms upon my kissed lips, it's you, I love....


Yep, that's something I remember having felt once, and it really seemed then that the world had stopped or acquired an extra dimension.. Colours seemed brighter and more colourful; things became at the same time so distant from my consciousness of things, yet so vivid and clear.. I lived a dream I never wanted to wake up from.

Thank you for sharing this poem with us. It has awoken memories that'd been buried somewhere in this silly head of mine. :)
Cheers!
angiasaa wrote:
Mar. 18th, 2004 04:35 am (UTC)
I read that yesterday but couldn't post my comment immediately..

I understand that so well.... Infact, I read your comment yesterday, but could'nt get around to replying.... I had the reply-window open on my screen all night and I kept postponing my response till it was early morning when I regretfully closed the window.... It's now 3:54 PM and I find I can reply more easily.... :) It happens with your posts and a few other peoples posts too. With me, I guess it's the depth of the words that causes me to hang back for a while while I digest it's connotations.... :)

It takes time for my mind to react to whatever feelings and sentiments that arise on reading this. Very good poem, Jim, and all the more better since you've written it down spontaneously.

Thankyou atharvan, I'm especially glad that you were able to relate to some of the emotions spread over these lines, it means a lot to me. I can't say how exactly, but in a way, it's heartening to know that I'm not the only person who can feel mental conditions within myself. :)

As to spontaneously, Every poem I've ever written has been spontaneous. I don't know any other way, I've tried writing in bits and bursts, that that somehow never happens, I'm not cut out to handle that I guess. :( Guess it's something you mould yourself into and can't survive too well with one foot in and one out the door. :P

Yep, that's something I remember having felt once, and it really seemed then that the world had stopped or acquired an extra dimension.. Colours seemed brighter and more colourful, things became at the same time so distant from my consciousness of things, yet so vivid and clear.. I lived a dream I never wanted to wake up from.

It's beautiful is'nt it, the way we perceive things differently in different moments and charmed moods, even though they have'nt changed in the slightest bit.... :) I can't say what it's like to have athat physical contact, but I can say for sure that my skin tingles when my mind creeps in stealthy thought and remniscence about things that have'nt yet come to pass me by....

Thank you for sharing this poem with us. It has awoken memories that'd been buried somewhere in this silly head of mine. :)

It was just as much pleasure writing this pome as it was reading your comment. :) Thankyou! :)

The pome was'nt ment to awaken memories, but I guess that's a part of emotional torture that somehow whells up and craves underlining. For one to understand, one either has to be totally out of whack or has experienced a situation that touches the same emotional array.... :)

Thankyou once again for a wonderful comment.

Kaydeeyoh!
atharvan wrote:
Mar. 18th, 2004 05:43 am (UTC)
It's a genuine pleasure to read your poem, Jim.

The pome was'nt ment to awaken memories, ..[...] For one to understand, one either has to be totally out of whack or has experienced a situation that touches the same emotional array.... :)

There is a small interval of tension; a point of separation between this reality and the next, when you pressed the button named 'post' and I clicked on another icon to read. When my eyes encountered those words of yours, my mind and heart also came in and interacted with the poem, making it, in a strange way, mine. You write with your own inspired fire, much of which inhabits those words, but I, as reader, have re-constructed it, adding my own meanings and purpose to this poem.

Had I not experienced what you have described, I would have regarded this poem as a very skilful and original piece of writing; here, though, the act of reading, comprehending and identifying myself with the meanings that those words above connote have made it more than a poem made of words; it is a song that sings loud and clear to me; it is a slideshow of colourful scenes of past, present and future that I visualise.

Perhaps, of course, I see more than what I'm supposed to. But, this is my privilege as individual (reader): to see and interpret and be touched by random things and random thoughts.

:)
Take care and
Cheers!
namus wrote:
Mar. 17th, 2004 05:58 pm (UTC)
Cool. The pre-love to love phase is explained and transitioned beautifully.
angiasaa wrote:
Mar. 18th, 2004 05:09 am (UTC)
Thankyou Suman, I frankly thought it was slightly haphazard and jumpy.... But that might be my own imagination, I dunno....

BTW, I added a couple of notes to the bottom of the Poem to explain a couple of things.... :o)
vandyvandana wrote:
Mar. 17th, 2004 09:30 pm (UTC)
ur OWN poem?

must say an amazing piece

*stands n claps with respect*
angiasaa wrote:
Mar. 18th, 2004 05:12 am (UTC)
Yes, I think it's my own, but you never know, it could well have been a product of creative schitzophrenia. lol!

Don't stand and clap in respect, I don't deserve such honor. :)
I'd prefer you shouting at me for not being enough of a romantic in the real world. :P

an amazing piece

Thankyou for that comment, it really put the smile back on my face.... :)
Best wishes....
vandyvandana wrote:
Mar. 18th, 2004 09:30 pm (UTC)
"Don't stand and clap in respect, I don't deserve such honor"

ofcourse u do...not everyone can write such a long poem n still make sense frm the first word to the last one!

"I'd prefer you shouting at me for not being enough of a romantic in the real world"

in the real world each one of us has many faces...
but when you try to pen down sumthing...its the REAL YOU who speaks thru ur writings

angiasaa wrote:
Mar. 18th, 2004 09:43 pm (UTC)
not everyone can write such a long poem n still make sense frm the first word to the last one!

Thankyou! By far, I'd say that's about the best thing I've heard someone say in regard to any of my pomes.... :"> *blushes!*

I try to be as real as I can.... Sometimes though, I tend to exaggerate, but that's only to zero-in to a specific feeling so a reader might focus his/her thoughts to gather the right level of emotional fluctuation that i intend to portray.... It's all figurative talk, but at the end of the day, It's not the words that should matter, it's the underlying feeling and emotion....

That's my dream anyways.... :)
alexli wrote:
Mar. 22nd, 2004 05:37 am (UTC)
excellence
I am back!

I'll talk to you thro istant messager
i am much better
this poem sounded very good to me
i love this styl much more than the other stuff you have
written
beauitiful puzzles of words
:)
see u around pal
be modest with the schizo- words please
take care,

ffae
angiasaa wrote:
Mar. 22nd, 2004 11:54 pm (UTC)
Re: excellence
Heyyyyy!! Welcome back Alexli,

Yes, I look forward to meeting you online soon.... and it's good to hear that you feel better after your week away. :)

this poem sounded very good to me
i love this styl much more than the other stuff you have written
beauitiful puzzles of words


Thankyou Al_, I wrote this poem on an impulse that even now, I'm not sure abuot the source. :) Upon re-reading this poem after I'd posted it, I saw a lot of mistakes, places where I could have made it rhyme and where I could change the phrases to carry more force.... But for some reason, I don't want to edit it even if I was forced to. :) Somehow, changing even a single word will change the emotional impact adn I can't risk that. :)

So I guess.... Sometimes, one has to give up on perfection. It's not always desirable. :-)

Take care of yourself and thankyou for the comment once again. :)
Kaydeeyoh!

F.F.E.A.E.
(Anonymous) wrote:
Mar. 31st, 2004 02:13 am (UTC)
Awesome!!
Great poem!
I just loved it.

I wrote a similar poem (though no way near as good as this!!!) a long time ago. Its weird that when one is most mentally disoriented and too emotional, he writes the best. That one is still my favourite poem, though I have never read it again, brings back too many memories.

But you sure reminded me how great it felt then, when everything looked so beautiful and inviting, as if you've got what you've always wanted, as if the whole world is at your feet, the open sky is waiting for you.....

But well, life has its phases. Each moment comes and goes, but leaves behind memories for a lifetime.


It's beautiful!

Cheers

Divya


subtle_blues wrote:
Apr. 4th, 2005 03:39 pm (UTC)
A sublime composition, This.

I read all the comments.. there's nothing more I wanna say.. they've said it all!
Though I do take my own sweet time to comprehend poems, they do make me smug when I'm done! Sad or happy a poem always leaves a smile on my face..
The first four lines are my personal fav!
cheerio!
angiasaa wrote:
Apr. 4th, 2005 06:18 pm (UTC)
Thankyou.... :o)

If there's one thing I shall wholely agree with, it's the fact that poems just have to go down slow.... :) there's no trade in beauty there.... :o)

Thankyou!
rashmiprasad wrote:
May. 20th, 2005 04:16 am (UTC)
wow.
angiasaa wrote:
May. 20th, 2005 01:46 pm (UTC)
:o) Thankyou. *blushes!*